How To Stop Being A Loser and Become A Winner – Part 2

In the first installment of this series I discussed two import principles that winners embrace; the fact that they don’t search for, or expect handouts, and the habit of having very high standards for any and all information they choose to consume.

Now for part two, where I discuss how winners select the company they keep, how they manage their spending and expand upon the principle of selective attention mentioned in part 1.


How To Stop Being A Loser and Become A Winner – Part 2


3. Be Selective About The Company You Keep

You’ve most likely heard the saying that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. I both agree and disagree with this.

For most people this is true, as they unconsciously take on whatever characteristics they observe in the people around them without thought. However for myself, and probably most of you reading this, you should be awake enough to identify dysfunctional characteristics and habits when you see them in the people that you involuntarily spend time with (colleagues, your boss etc).

My spin on this principle is:

You are the average of the five people you pay attention to.

If you can, remove negative people and losers that don’t benefit you from your life. Now this doesn’t mean that you should cut off ties with everybody that isn’t a jacked-millionaire-pimp. If somebody is just fun to hang around, then that benefits you, dunnit?

When it comes to deciding the people I am going to spend my very limited “relaxation” time with, they need not be relentlessly determined and focused people like myself, typically I just like to relax with people that are funny as shit or are enjoyable to hang around. While I do like being around other determined and motivated individuals, it is not a must.

However, just because somebody has a good sense of humor, doesn’t mean they can’t be a negative little shit too. I’m not going to waste time with old friends who feel entitled to my company because we grew up together if they spend said time in my company either complaining about bullshit, taking themselves too seriously, gossiping about irrelevant people or voicing their negative opinions on the way I conduct my life compared to how I used to in the past.

Yes I used to drink lots of alcohol and I had a very relaxed view on my diet and training compared to what I do now.

Yes I was mediocre and consequently ate shit regularly because of it. I have now fixed the previously dysfunctional aspects of my life and some people just can’t handle change, as such I don’t have any interest in being around anybody who offers resistance towards me achieving the life that I want to, regardless of how long I’ve known them for.

Winners eliminate all negative people from their life where possible, where they must interact with losers, they will consciously identify dysfunctional characteristics and be sure not to embody them.


4. Consumer Debt Is Slavery

“New car man? Looks good.”

“Yeah dude, I just took out a $25,000 loan for it, I should have it paid back within three years if I save well, But it’s worth it!”

“…Is it?”

The tendency to take on consumer debt is something I never understood, and probably never will.

Debt is slavery. Debt means you’re locked into your job where the best chance you have at escaping lies in winning the lottery.

If you’re completely happy with that, then so be it. If you’re content with waking up three years from now earning pretty much the same amount of money doing something you don’t enjoy with no means of escape, good for you. Personally, I would rather die than resign to indefinite boredom and sacrificing my freedom for a car that only gives me pleasure for the first few weeks.

Consumer debt is a powerful device of enslavement that the mediocre commonly suffer from. The reason why it is so common is because so many people crave the rewards of hard work “RIGHT FUCKING NOW!”, yet do not want to do the work.

Our society is built upon consumerism, and in a way we should be thankful that most people are idiots, otherwise the economy would be fucked. If people woke up and realized that getting that new car or boat on credit will not make their lives better after the initial purchase pleasure has faded, a lot more fuckers would be unemployed.

Materialistic consumerism is what makes the world go around. Everyone else can waste away in their shitty jobs paying off theirs debts for items they don’t need. But not us winners, mate.

Now, there is nothing wrong with buying and enjoying nice things, but ONLY BUY THEM IF YOU HAVE THE MONEY TO DO SO!

I intend on both making a lot of money and buying my fair share of cool shit in my life. But before possessing luxury items, my priority remains in remaining financially secure and never falling victim to a life of long-term wage-slavery.

I’ve had less than $100 to my name before, and it sucked. It’s pretty much the same when the majority of your paycheck goes to debt.

The only time I would consider borrowing money is if it were for a business investment that had a good chance of returning that money back sooner than I would notice the money was gone.

Remember: Winners live below their means.

I don’t make spare-of-the-moment decisions to buy cool but pointless items, I don’t piss away my bank balance on alcohol and the only thoughts I have about money are my plans to expand and make more of it. Making ends meet isn’t an issue because I live a simple life.

I find happiness in writing for hours on end or doing deadlifts until I either collapse and can no longer think, not by saying “credit, please” to the checkout chick as she bags up the latest copy of Call of Duty.

Winners know consumer debt is slavery. Losers see consumer debt as the path to happiness. 


Derp Derp5. Reality TV, Elections and Sports Are Not The Least Bit Important.

“TV and gossip is the consolation prize for being a failure” – Owen Cook

Something I never really understood is the amount of energy the general public put into things that are so far outside of themselves, they have no control over and don’t actually matter.

Sports is a big example, I can understand enjoying a game and chilling out with some friends, but fuck me mate; when I see a butt-hurt little bitch post a long-winded rant on Facebook about a decision made by an umpire that cost their team the game; I shake my head in confusion, feel really bad that I will never get back those ten seconds it took to read this bullshit yet still question how something as insignificant as a game is given so much significance to this persons happiness.

Losers lose because the quality of their lives is determined by external factors: whether it’s the performance of their sports team, who wins the election or who got eliminated from American Idol. It’s all wasted attention.

Winners win because they focus on making themselves and their life situation better. Instead of watching a one hour update on the current election, then arguing about it on Facebook for the next three hours before going to bed in a stew of negative emotions, with scattered thoughts and contempt for people they’ve never met/don’t matter, the winner is in the gym putting himself through hell. He’s reading books written by successful people or he is busy building something of value.

He doesn’t care for gossip about other losers, he doesn’t care for sports beyond the momentary enjoyment of watching the game itself or learning from the athletes, he’s too busy becoming a winner to care about bullshit.


To summarize:

  • Winners are extremely selective about the company they keep and the people they let influence their actions.
  • Winners live below their means, as they know consumer debt is slavery.
  • Winners ignore all that is irrelevant to their immediate reality, TV and gossip are the consolation prize for being a failure.

Stay tuned for part 3.

Until then,

Get hustling.


Ryan Kuchel


Wake Up After Post

About the Author

Ryan Kuchel is an entrepreneur and founder of

Leave a Reply 3 comments

Hugo - March 5, 2014 Reply

Fuck, this post is good. You need to get this out there.

You’re very right on the notion that people invest WAY too much energy and emotion into things that are entirely out of their control.

The only time I’ve ever had to flick on the tv is when I’m eating, which is often about 10 minutes a day. Even then, I grow tiresome of its drivel and I need to dive into something more enriching, such as a book or writing.

Indeed, there is much happiness to be sought in the simple act of writing, creating and crafting. Be it the mind or the body at the gym (unfortunately I see stars at 240lb deadlift).

    Ryan Kuchel - March 5, 2014 Reply

    Thanks brother!

    My advice is build up your “watch later” list on youtube with inspiring shit rather than whatever is on TV. Whenever I need to sit down for a meal or do my daily stretching, I sit infront of youtube and go through the videos I’ve accumulated, or listen to audiobooks. This way I’m always learning something/listening to motivational people.

Mark Edward - May 20, 2014 Reply

I couldn’t agree more on point 5. When i see people over reacting to sports, tv shows and politics i get pissed off. Who cares really?

You have missed another bad habit. Checking espn website to check if there’s any latest article on their favourite players/teams. Or watching highlights/replay.

Leave a Reply: